Academic Books Unlikely to Be Written

• 7 (or Maybe 8) Types of Ambiguity (or Is It Ambivalence?)


• The Interpreter of Anxiety, or How Large Is Harold Bloom's Ego Really?


• There’s No Such Thing as Stanley Fish and It’s a Fantastic Thing Too.


• The Work of Morning: The Seven Habits of Highly Effective French Philosophers


• On the Pragmatics of Social Interaction: An Academic's Guide to Small Talk


• The Postmodern Conditioner: Haircare in an Uncertain World


• The Prolix View: The Selected Works of Slavoj Zizek


• The Well-Bought Urn: Collected Essays on Antiques Roadshow


• The History of Sexuality Vol. 1: Illustrated Edition


• Ick und Doo: A Study of Scatological References in German Romantic Poetry


• Course in the Positive Philosophy, or AJ Ayer Wasn’t as Morose as You May Think


• Discipline and Punish, and Other Lively Ideas for Themed Faculty Parties


• Blender Trouble: A Fix-It-Yourself Guide for the Academic


• Homo Slacker: Undergraduate Existence and Bare Life


• Glace: 5-Minute Desserts from Jacques's Kitchen